“I was stolen—and I fell in love with the thief. “

“I was stolen–and I fell in love with the thief. “

Love, when spelled in different letters, is still love.

It is love–in the form of a good girl friends whom you always miss,

of a mom who wakes you up when your alarm can’t,

of a dad who forgets your age and still kisses you bye-bye,

of sisters who still feed you even though you’re full,

of a grandma who tells stories over and over again.

-

Love in the form of a once nice pair of Chucks gone dirty,

of a very sexy scent that you can smell on your sweat,

of a cheap, second-hand book you’ll read til you doze off,

of a cool, sunny day that you didn’t wished for but is still there.

-

Love; of a miracle you knew would happen,

of a cold, empty room waiting to be filled,

of a good, cheerful song you can’t get out of your head,

of your all-time crush-turned patiently-waiting-suitor.

-

Still it’s love,

in the form of an unexpected beautiful reflection of you in the jeepney,

of a smile of a cute guy with earphones passing by,

of a text message with an I love you and a  Mwah.

-

Love.

of a pair of laughing eyes on yours,

of a lips so tender you want to kiss over and over again,

of a promise of an elegant wedding based from a dream,

of a hug and the scent that comforts you,

of a touch that means you’re not alone,

of a lover that you’ll never dare hurt.

“What is beauty?” by the exCOMMUNICADO

But nobody knows how true love looks like,

Not until its in your face,

not until its in your life.

I don’t know the difference

between a love, and a love that’s true

All I know is that whenever I feel love,

I think of you.

Love is not as cheap as the lunch you had,

or the book you saved your week’s allowance for.

“Third Party” by the exCOMMUNICADO

Love cannot be easily shattered,

by late-night texts

Of I-love-you’s from a stranger,

Love is more than that–

It is challenged by time and fate.

Love is constant, it never changes.

Love is superior, it never fails.

True love is not an everyday affair.

Not a thing you can see now, and then disappears in a blink.

True love is endless, it is in itself an eternity,

True love cannot be ruined by an expensive secret date.

It will always show itself, in forms you’ll never know…

“Even the sky falls in love” by the exCOMMUNICADO

Love is when you thought you are complete, not until someone made you

realize you are not.

For he’s the half to make you whole.

True love is the highest form of love, the only form there ever is.

It’s like buying yourself an expensive slice of chocolate cake,

though you know you are diabetic.

“I love you, – Jose Rizal” by the exCOMMUNICADO

It is risking everything, with the hope of nothing.

True love is a suicide, so you won’t die.

It is living for the sake of someone, and not because you have a life.

True love will make you hate yourself, because you’re giving too much,

but you know you can’t help it, because it is love.

-the exCOMMUNICADO, 8/25/09

The Unspoken Eulogy.

I wish you were here.

- Owl City, Vanilla Twilight

With the sound of my alarm, came the thought that today will be the saddest day of my life.

It’s five in the morning of the seventeenth of January 2010. Ten days after my Lolo Ben passed away. Who would’ve thought that this day will ever come. I kept my eyes open, amidst the very strong desire to sleep more, because I want to wake up and see my Lolo (grandfather) for the last time.

The hardest thing to accept about my Lolo’s passing is that, no one can ever replace him. He saw me grow up, he was there in all the events of my life.

The stars lean down to kiss you
And I lie awake and miss you,
Pour me a heavy dose of atmosphere…

Last December 23, 2009, I can’t sleep because I’m thinking about Lolo. My sister, Marie, traded places with me in the bed and I agreed. I cried, and I really missed everything about Lolo when I was lying on that part of bed, where Lolo used to sit down. Until I finally dozed off to sleep, I had a very terrible nightmare. Not to mention my mirror broke yesterday in front of the house.

My dream or nightmare, had two parts. First, I died in my dream. Second, I saw a very bright light. And then, I saw Lolo wearing his Barong Tagalog and he was smiling and looking downwards. There was a voice over, Lolo’s voice was clear and he said, “Alagaan niyo si Lola niyo, siya lang ang minahal ko…” (Take care of your grandma, she’s the only woman I’ve ever loved), something like that and his last line was, “Happy New Year.” And suddenly I was murmuring why Lolo said that and stuff like that and then my breathing became harder and as I woke up, Alou and Marie realized my difficulty in breathing. I realized I am feeling the same difficulty that Lolo feels at that moment. And I also realized that, that was just part of my dream, I’m not really awake yet. And when I did, I was so scared and my breathing and heart beating were both fast and weird.

Anyway, I still woke up, and for the first time, went to the Simbang Gabi (Christmas Midnight Mass) 4:30AM mass alone. I thought to myself, there’s no stopping me now. I’ve got to do this for my Lolo most especially that he sent me a message through my dream.

‘Cause I’ll doze off safe and soundly,
But I’ll miss your arms around me
I’d send a postcard to you, dear,
‘Cause I wish you were here.

He was the perfectionist, the disciplinarian, the feared Lolo Ben. I will never forget how great the fear I felt when I was still in elementary, and me and my younger sister were playing volleyball in the garage when I accidentally hit the light bulb with the ball and it dropped to the cement floor and crashed. Luckily, Lolo was asleep. I went to the drawer where the light bulbs were kept and looked for the price of that bulb. As far as I can remember, I knew that it was a Philips light bulb, a big one with higher watts, and it costs P300-ish each. I got scared because I realized that it was expensive.

And so, when Lolo woke up and went to the dining area to have his signature merienda of pan de sal dipped in Coke, I went to him, my eyes and cheeks filled with sad tears, and admitted that I accidentally hit the bulb with the ball and so I’m giving my $5 for the replacement of the bulb.
Unexpectedly, Lolo didn’t get mad at me. He just told me “ang galing mo naman  umasinta.” (you’re good at hitting the target) I thought it was sarcastic, but nothing changed between us and I really felt relieved when the bulb was replaced and I still have my $5.

I’ll watch the night turn light-blue,
But it’s not the same without you,
Because it takes two to whisper quietly…

After the burial of my Lolo, Kevin made me wish on a fallen eyebrow. And my wish was, Sana mabuhay ulit si Lolo (I wish Lolo will live again). I don’t know but that was the only wish my heart has at that very moment. And if it were to come true, I probably would ask God that he live again with Him, not in this world anymore, where he can feel pain and sufferings, where he’ll have to eat through a tube and never know how it tasted, where no nurse will ever tie his hands on his bed because he kept on talking the tubes off, where he can sleep longer and no doctors will ever disturb him during their rounds, where there are no cats to shoo when they went inside the house, and where he’ll never lose when he plays Mah jjong.

The silence isn’t so bad
‘Til I look at my hands and feel sad,
‘Cause the spaces between my fingers
Are right where yours fit perfectly…

I wish that he will live his new life where he can eat all the taba (fatty food) that he wants, where the radio plays his favorite ol’ Matt Monroe songs not only on Sunday mornings but everyday, where he will never slip and fall on the toilet floor, where he won’t have to deal with feelings he don’t even understand, where breathing will be easier, where he will always be calm… where he can find peace.

I’ll find repose in new ways
Though I haven’t slept in two days
‘Cause cold nostalgia
Chills me to the bone…

If I were to have choice, I would do the same with what God did; to take him away from this world full of hurt and pains even though a lot of people will be sad, a lot of people will cry. Because I know that he is in a better and safer place now, he might be around us, I may not know but he could be beside me as I write this, but although I have already shed the tears I’ve never shed before in my entire life, I can say that I am happy that Lolo is with God, free from pain and sadness. And most especially because as Jesus said, “In a little while you will not see me any more, and then a little while later you will see me.” (Jn. 16:16)

But drenched in vanilla twilight,
I’ll sit on the front porch all night.
Waist-deep in thought because
When I think of you I don’t feel so alone…

I know it will be hard for me to face each day without my Lolo. Of course I have to be strong, because it is a reality that all people are going to die, and all relationships will come to an end. I am just so blessed to have spent my time with my Lolo during the last days of his life here on earth. I was able to talk to him, to take care of him, to see him as he remains strong just to be healthy and go back home. But Lolo didn’t want me to see him at the last minute of his life, he wanted me to accept the reality that he’d rather be around us all the time, than us around his hospital bed.

I don’t feel so alone, I don’t feel so alone

As many times as I blink,
I’ll think of you tonight
I’ll think of you tonight.

I will never forget his priceless smiles, his cute very-Lolo Ben deeds, his cursing of the cats, his generosity for puhunan (mah jjong money), his never-ending additional baon, his petty fights with Lola, his classic antics about Mang Eliong and Mang Piping, his Eternity scent that you can still smell on your lips after you kiss his cheek, his little but happy dance moves, his favorite basketball team Purefoods, his constant reminder of drinking Milo for breakfast, his oatmeal with pan de sal breakfast and pan de sal dipped into Coke Zero merienda, and what really makes me cry up until now, is his voice whenever I called at QC… His very serious “Hello”, that will change when I say, “Lolo”… And he recognized that it is me, and he’ll say “Ju-day” and I’d say “Good evening”, and he’ll say the same with his very caring voice… God, it still echoes in my head until now… I will never forget that. The same way as I will never walk without my slippers on–just as what Lolo told us again and again… And up until his last days, he didn’t want his bare feet to touch the dirty ground.

(this photo was captioned, Buddha and his granddaughter, yes, that’s me.)

When violet eyes get brighter,
And heavy wings grow lighter,
I’ll taste the sky and feel alive again…

There are so many things to remember about Lolo, and all these things make me cry. But I have to move forward, live on. Because I promised to him that everything that I will become from now on, will all be for him. And that he will always be my inspiration until the day that we see each other again–in paradise.

And I’ll forget the world that I knew,
But I swear I won’t forget you,
Oh, if my voice could reach
Back through the past,
I’d whisper in your ear…
Oh darling, I wish you were here.

Lolo, thank you for living for us. I promise to take care of Lola and to make you the proudest Lolo ever. I hope you’ve heard my last words for you, that I will say and mean over and over again, everyday of my life…

I love you, Lolo.

+ Benito T. Calzada, Sr.

January 12, 1932 – January 07, 2010

A P100-worth Date.

How far can this P100 go?

Kevin and I decided to have a Grepa date today. Grepa, is a word that you can use to refer to poor, poverty, low class, cheap–well, it depends on the context. Here, a grepa date will mean a cheap or a not-expensive date to be exact. And so, we chose Luneta Park as the location. Time is 11:30am-5pm. And here’s what we only have:

• 100 pesos cash on hand.
• A buko juice on Kevin’s thermos.
• A pack of Cream-o on Judy’s bag.
• And a cheap digicam for documentation.

First purchase:
(above) remnants of our ice cream, we forgot we have to take pictures. heehee.

Dirty ice cream worth P10 each x 2 = P20

Wrong move. We should’ve bought only one ice cream and shared on it to add it a little cheesy feel. Haha. Too late, though, I can sell it to a kid who’s bored of waiting to be served. Haha.

There was a Manong who followed us and asked us to buy his huge foil thing which I thought as a props for picture taking. Kevin said it is an insulator mat, perfect for picnic dates, which will absorb the heat of the ground and avoid balisawsaw. It costs P20 and I was thinking of asking Manong if we can just borrow and return it clean and safely to him for free if we’ll be needing such. Glad we didn’t have to, I saved my face and our twenty bucks.

Second purchase:
(above) our tickets to Chinese Garden

Chinese Garden entrance fee P5 each x 2 = P10

This one’s a bit worth it. We stayed here for a while and we just enjoyed picture taking, me the newest photography hobbyist, and Kevin, the professional model–by force. Haha. We had a lot of good shots here and a nice view from the pagoda since some high school boys are doing some break-dancing and tumbling (which Kevin classified as Diablo or Vertical, some stuff like that) which pretty amazed us both for the time being.

Third purchase:

(above) P30 student-discounted meal inclusive of rice, viand, soup, and a pitcher of water

Come lunch time, it was very difficult to find real food inside Luneta, all you can find there are chips, biscuits, and cup noodles worth P25; well, jjamppong is worth P30 as noted by Manang vendor. No-no. So we searched until we left Luneta and crossed to the other side hoping to find carinderias around the two nearby universities. We’ve searched forever and walked the world in search for the lowest bid for a humane meal. Haha. And we finally decided to give up with the P30 each, as indicated it was a student-discounted meal (even though we have no IDs at that time, you just have to look like lost kids) inclusive of rice, viand, a free soup, and a pitcher of water. At that time, water was the box-office hit since our only refuge for water was Kevin’s buko juice in a thermos which I so loved! The funniest thing was, when we realized that the place is not a carinderia after all. It is a beer house. And the table beside us was full of half empty bottles of San Mig Light and someone was singing her heart out Luha by Aegis. Take note, it’s only lunch time.

Student discounted meal with soup and service water P30 each meal x 2 = P60

We realized that the grepa-iest part of our date was when we gave up with the outdoor noontime heat and succumbed to the coolness that SM Manila offers for free. Haha. Free restroom–unlike the one in Luneta where I had to pay P2 as an Entrance Fee. And to my surprise, there’s no sink or a faucet either. Where would my two bucks go? I dunno. Also, I forgot to bring my face powder and so, to the highest grepa level, we went to a boutique and I made use of the Pressed Powder tester. LOL.

We spent two hours sitting down and taking pictures and doing what grepa people do inside the malls–nagpapalamig nang wala namang bibilhin. Haha.

We were thinking about what to do with our last money, P10. Since we thought we cannot buy anything inside SM worth ten bucks, we used it to pay for the jeepney fare to Midtown, borrowing two bucks from Kevin.

Jeepney Fare to Midtown P6 (student discount) x 2 = P12 (debt P2 from Kevin)

We enjoyed the date, though we became a lot darker and were dissatisfied with our lunch. Our lesson learned is probably, if you don’t have money, then don’t go out on a date. Save money for each other because even if they say that the best things in life are free, in reality, you have to spend because grepa dates are just meant for experience and for blogs, and these kind of dates are not what girls really daydream about. Not to mention that guys who have no money to spend for their girlfriends are not their dream guys. But for a guy to find a girl who won’t give up on grepa dates, and for a girl to stay happy with his guy given a very tight budget, is another story.

Kevin with the author at Chinese Garden.

“When were hungry, love will keep us alive”.
- Eagles, Love will keep us alive

Matthew.

They say it comes in threes. We fulfilled the prophecy. Our third breakup happened last month, October 5th.

I realized that the truest definition of love is when you both know that in this life, you are meant to be. That no matter what life gives you–you know how harsh the world is–in the end, if you find yourselves in each other’s arms again, then you’ve always been in love with the same person, everyday, with or without him.

I wrote this after our breakup a month ago.

I never thought Matt has been as beautiful as the person i’ve waved a temporary goodbye awhile ago. I saw in him a man who spoke as if he had lived a life ahead of his real age of sixteen, who listened as if he had heard thousands of stories from different people in his very long existence.

I was so surprised to realized that i was the one who’s been wrong all along. I was the one trying to be the perfect girl, the right one, the good daughter, the woman conceived without sin. But i was just human. I was just me. And i am destined to make mistakes, to err, to choose, to survive, and to die–eventually.

He kept on telling me “okay lang yan…(it’s okay)” as if he had already tasted every bit of everyone’s lives. But he was completely right. Your whole life won’t crash with a single stupid mistake. You should enjoy life while you have it.

I was always on the safe side, i wanted to make myself a model of goodness, of greatness. I wanted to be always clean. Never thought im missing out on the real essence of life.

I lived by the book. Matt lived his life. “Napakaraming masama sa mundo, sa totoo lang, pero nasa saiyo naman yan, kung magpapalulong ka. Basta wag mo lang kalimutan yung taong mahal mo. Magtext ka kahit kanino, basta wag ka lang mangloloko” (There are so many bad things in this world, that’s the truth. But it all depends in you, if you will let it dominate you. Just don’t forget the one you love. You can text anyone, flirt with anyone, but don’t ever cheat.)

I was so guilty. But i was so proud. That he had learned it all because of our, all in all, four years of being together and being apart.

I remember one point in my life when i realized the lesson that Matt taught me that i keep on forgetting, or pretending to forget. That i am not perfect. That i should not be perfect. And that i will never be perfect. I realized that people as immortals are damned to commit sin, to do bad things, to give in to temptations, but in the end, its still about you, finding your way out amidst all the sickness and filth that this world have. It’s all upon you on how you can make your life worth it. It’s when you’ve did everything you can possibly do but still always keeping in mind your limits and the persons that you may hurt along the way.

Life is not about perfection, but of survival. And if in case you find your life too imperfect, heck, at least you continue to survive and was able to think about imperfections.

I never thought that it was always me who was immature. That he’s the one who really has trust and faith in me. Who always wanted to stay committed to me given the temptations, he remains resilient, but human. It is Matt’s ability to become human that I’ve always loved. It’s his imperfections that made me stay with him for the longest time. It’s his flaws that made me want to continue living for him. Because i know that i am his missing puzzle piece. I am the one who will complement his life. The one who needs him, and not exactly the one he needs. I am the one who lived because of him, and not just because he can’t live without me. He loved me so much, but i was full of distrust, fear, jealousy, and greed. I was so wrong, but he corrected me. I was so sad, but he made me happy. I was so incomplete, but he loved me. I was a nobody then, but when he came to me, I became myself.

He knew things i thought i already know. I thought given my age, i am wiser than him. That i am better than him. I was wrong. He knew life better than me. And that’s when my intelligence and my age doesn’t count anything anymore.

I’m so proud of how he handles life, he lives it well, though with regrets, the best part of it still was the risk taking. It doesn’t matter if its wrong, as long as you never regretted doing it. And if you ever regret it, at least you did not live with it for long.

Life is about making choices, and i chose the wrong option. I opted for the safest way, the less pain, the better side, the wider road. But matt lived the one with the most left and right turns, the one not all people have ever been. He was very brave to face life’s challenges at a very early age of sixteen, but he keeps his limitations and he knows that though the consequences may hurt, at least you’ve experienced it in your very own life.

We’re young, (though he was younger) and it is the most normal thing to commit mistakes when you’re young. You have to experience everything to prepare yourself for the bigger problems ahead. And Matt also taught me that lesson. That you are not born to make the world a better place to live in per se, it’s about making yourself fulfilled with what the world cannot give you. It’s about finding yourself amidst the tough crowd.

You have to survive, and you have a lot of choices to make, in order to do so. You hold your life, no one else does but your hands. Not until marriage, wherein you have to join hands with the greatest person you’ve loved so truly no matter what the world has done to take you apart.

I don’t know how to end this. I just want to concretize my feelings right now… That i am so proud of my man, my big young man. And i am happy to have learned about life from him.

Life is about finding yourself–in the eyes of another person… and Eureka. I have found it.

My twent-eenth birthday.

000 hours.
The first 10 people to greet me on 12am of October 28th:

10. Phia Salvacion
9. Xin Yaoyao
8. Kate Genova
7. Kevin Aladin
6. Jam Salvacion
5. Mich Espiritu
4. Alou Santiago
3. Matthew Espiritu
2. Lorn Conejos
1. Eunice Sacdalan

100 hours.
First Phonecall:
- Kevin Aladin

Loveletters from:
- My two evil sisters. LOL. But these letters made me cry. Realleh.

800 hours.
Mami woke me up and asked me to deposit some money somewhere. Okayy. And left me with super-krisis-naman-mami-oh money for my birthday celeb. At least she left me with something. I remembered the night before I cried and had tantrums because she told me she won’t give me anything. Huhu. Only Kevin knew ’bout that. Haha.

900 hours.

Birthday messages from:

Jel. Tita Weng. Jane. Mary. Jasper. Ate. Mommy. Ping. Meng. Raulff. Allan. Anton. Nineh. Derby. Mavic. Ate Sela and Kuya Dolfo. Ate Juni. Jena. Ralph. Ace. Riel. Papa.

Thank you so much.

1200 hours.
Lunch at McDo SM Bicutan with Matt.
Our first meeting since we… you know… broke up. You ask, WHY JUDY, WHY? Well, after our break up, he asked me, “pano sa birthday mo?” And I told him i promise I’ll be with him on my birthday. And so I kept the promise and did.

1300 hours.
Very sweet, he was carrying this huge gift inside a Rustan’s plastic bag, and he asked me to open it in his face. Haha. And it was very sweet, for Tita Weng (his mom) wrapped it for 8 times, im not sure, in a gift wrapper, and then in a bag, and then in several wraps of newspaper, then finally, a National Bookstore plastic bag. And when I opened the plastic, I was very nervous (because I already know that it’s a book, and of course it’s a Stephen King book, and it’s a hardbound! and finally, it’s the missing piece in my Dark Tower series collection! Tadah! The Dark Tower V: Wolves of the Calla by Stephen King! And it’s not only from Booksale, it’s from NB! Aww… The most expensive in my collection yet. And oh, the priceless part of the gift, is the birthday message by everyone, including all their dogs (am surprised, there’s a new dog in town! Dumplings! ) Thank you very much and i love you always, Tita Weng (and of course Tito Mitch), Mich, Momas, YanYan and Matt.

1400 hours.
I received a great deal of text messages from different cell numbers. And I was surprised because most of the texts were like this:

Happy birthday! From: Kevin

I’m so surprised because Kevin haven’t texted yet this morning. And during that time pala he’s bugging everyone in his contacts to greet me. Aww. Too sweet. I replied to every kind one who texted and hoped to meet them personally. Thank you, Kevin and Friends!

1500 hours.
A birthday nap. Slept for quite a while and woke up to hear 6:30pm mass.

1830 hours.
Mass at the National Shrine of MHC. It was funny to remark that on the gospel for October 28, since it’s Sts. Simon and Jude’s feast day, Judas and Santiago were mentioned. I feel so Biblical. Haha.

1930 hours.
Dinner at Shakey’s SM Bicutan with Kevin.
Okay. I’m consistently late or he’s just consistently early? I don’t know. Haha. He came from Intramuros pa ah, and as for me, I’m just a tricycle away from SM. Too bad.

Aww. I never thought he prepared 3 gifts for me. Sweetest. White, yellow, and blue.
- White: Frostee, the cutest little teddy bear wearing an orange shirt with a Happy Birthday printed on it
- Yellow: A black bracelet–that’s armlet for me, seriously–twin with Kevin’s
- Blue: A pair of berry-heart silver earrings from Unisilver

And it doesn’t stop there, he also made these two tearjerkers:
- 5 letters (which, according to him, was supposed to be 9 because he’ll write everyday for nine days before my birthday)
- a CD with a very very sweet video presentation

2100 hours.
It was a great night of yummy dinner and beautiful pictures, and also a wonderful moment to spent with him. And since SM closes at 9pm, we need to go home that early.

2130 hours.
Afterwards, I went to the computer shop and (HERE COMES NEW SOCIAL MEDIA) checked my FB which has 99 notifications.

Whew! I have so many wall post with birthday greetings from my friends! Very sweet of them to remember. And am very thankful to FB for making it easier for my friends to make me happy.

Back to the trad media.

2200 hours.
As for Kevin’s letter, I think I don’t have to elaborate further on the details. HAHA. But for the video presentation… I think I can and I should tell you what’s in it.

He told me it was porn. Haha. But when I played it in the PC, I asked everyone in my house to watch. Yeah. So that includes me and my two sisters, my mom and Dada. I was very excited to know what’s in the vid. Well, I’ve asked permission to post it here, but he declined. Saad. I’m so proud of it pa naman. But then, the vid has 3 parts.

The first part was an intro, and the background song was A Whole New World. Wahaha.

The second part (and the sweetest part) is his own rendition of Balisong by Rivermaya. He’s playing the guitar and of course, singing. While watching him doing just that, I kept on thinking when did he ever did that. Because I know he’s very busy and has no time to do such thing. Haha. But i really felt special while watching that and i covered myself with a pillow because I can’t let Mommy see me blushing–although I was screaming na. Hahaha.

The third part was like a slide show of our first ever pictures together which were taken last October 22 at Midtown in Rob Manila. Mommy kept on commenting on our pictures, and I find it funny when after the vid, she was LSS of I’m Yours, the background song of that part. Haha. I’m so shy of what Kevin wrote in that vid because my family saw it all and I’m dead. Haha.

2300 hours.
I bought ice cream for my family, and Mommy bought pancit, okay. Haha. Papa called the day after, I knew he thought my birthday’s on the 29th. Tsk. Haha.

2400 hours.
Of course, a lot of friends texted me until the night ended. And I can say, I was really really happy with all that happened today. Everything was perfect. And I never thought I could deserve a birthday as sweet as this one.

Every birthday is unique in itself, it depends on the people around you and who are you with during that time. This year, I’m happy that I really felt the presence of the people I have always love, and of the new people I have come to love. I’m so thankful to God that at twenty, I feel as if I’m experiencing the best things in life–for the first time.

More gifts!

The Nicest Gift:
Tom Baker placed the exCOMMUNICADO link in his Links! http://morningerection.wordpress.com/

The Greatest Gift:
Another year to live, love, and i-don’t-know-yet!

The Dream come true:
0.25 incentive in OrCom 152 because YOU made exCOMMUNICADO make it to the Top 20 blogs Final Cut by ranking 14! Thank you very much!

THANK YOU.
My family. Timber. Xiju. Jesu Friends. DOST Friends. OrCom people. UPM people. AMHC Juniors. Mapua people. GG’s. Ms. Chinkai. Espiritu Family. Fans and friends of the exCOMMUNICADO. All the men in my life. Kevin.

You know who you are.

Thank you. Thank God.

Michael Jackson’s THIS IS IT

Discover the man you never knew.

See, hear, and feel the Legend as Michael Jackson’s  THIS IS IT conquers the world on 10.28.09. THIS IS IT will offer Jackson fans and music lovers worldwide a rare, behind-the-scenes look at the performer as he developed, created and rehearsed for his sold-out concerts that would have taken place beginning this summer in London’s 02 Arena.

And but of course, yes visitor.

This is it. You have the chance to win a free movie date with ME, yes, the exCOMMUNICADO and watch MICHAEL JACKSON’S THIS IS IT on October 28, 2009 at the IMAX Theatre, Mall of Asia. Isn’t that great?!

You ask how? VERY SIMPLE.

How to win:

1. View this blog: http://longlivejudyism.wordpress.com/ (which you just did! You are now qualified. Isn’t that easy?)

2. Post the link in your Facebook wall.

3. The challenging part: Make a very catchy tagline to make your friends view this post and join the contest! The tagline should also include an answer to this question, “What is your favorite line in any of Michael Jackson’s song lyrics?”

4. Don’t forget to include the link in your tagline! And POST it in MY wall.

5. The best and most catchy tagline to generate the most views and most comments will have an exclusive movie date with me to Michael Jackson’s This is it! Check my blog on October 27, 2009 and let’s see who wins this!

 

NOTE: This is not a bluff. Why? Because on October 28th, will be my 20th birthday! And this will be a crazy birthday for me especially I don’t know yet who I’m going to be with. Haha!

 Thank you very much and I hope you could win! Spread the word!

Here’s the official Michael Jackson’s This is it Trailer to make you want to join more!

For more details, visit http://www.thisisit-movie.com/

 

In our hearts, long live, MJ.

Unveiling the Silver Screen: Showcasing the 25 Years of OrCom

It was a gamble–to dream of gathering the OrCom Alumni from Batch 1988 to present. We’ve placed our bets that this will push through no matter if two of the strongest typhoons hit Manila. And as if someone held a four-leaf clover as the game progresses, in the end, we hit the jackpot.

A night that overflowed with OrCom goodness–those memories we always want to remember; friendships that were never lost;and beautiful faces, that OrCom never runs out of. The Silver Screen is indeed a huge success of not only the organizers, but most especially, all of the people who made OrCom still OrCom. Still the only life-changing course, as it has been for already 25 years now.

The good-looking emcees, OrCom Alumnus Earl Guico and OrCom Senior Alex Purugganan liven up the night with their superb chemistry and hosting prowess that is beyond doubt, OrCom!

The OrCom Lifetime Achievement Award goes to the mother of Organizational Communication in UP Manila: Dr. Angela Sarile. The biggest credit goes to her, for without her, we would have been enrolled in ’some other course’. And we don’t want that. Of course, no one does. Haha.

And the award for the star of the night goes to: the Silver Screen Photo Wall. Haha. OrCom loves to keep those beautiful memories and immortalize those beautiful smiles. The OrCom program is indeed a proof that even though nobody’s perfect, there really exists people who both have beauty and brains.

(above) TIMBER with Alvina Antonio at the Silver Screen.

The Tearjeker of the Night was Behind the Reel; the tribute to two of the greatest institutions of OrCom in UP Manila. Dr. Angela Sarile and Prof. Teresita Vaquer. They are the living proofs that OrCom is more than learning about communication rather, it is about touching lives with every word you speak. Jam and I gave them bouquets of flowers from Holland Tulips before the tribute speeches from selected students (our exposure for the night! ).

Since OrCom students are not only great communicologist but also the fashionistas of UP Manila, selected OrCom students, strutted down the catwalk exuding their OrCom auras to complement the upbeat music of Lady Gaga, were donned with creations of Yako Reyes and armed with bags from one of the major sponsors, Baggets.

There was dinner of course, a sumptuos and overflowing one, that made everybody forget about their diet, and a raffle giving away 10 gift bags from ETC, the major sponsor of Silver Screen and 4 ticket refunds. Yay!

Not only did OrCom celebrated 25 years of academic excellence but the event was also a venue to pool donations–both in cash and in kind–for the victims of the recent typhoon Ondoy. This just goes to show that amidst the fabulous event, OrCom people do not overlook the reality that our countrymen needs help.

To call it a day (or a night), Madame Inton expressed his gratitude and appreciation to all the people who made the Silver Anniversary slash Alumni Homecoming Ball fabulously possible.

The night may have ended, but the OrCom legacy continues… The past 25 years was worthwhile. Let us look forward to many more years to come. I’m so proud to be part of the history. Moreover, I am so proud to be OrCom. Cheers! And, see you on the Golden.

Signal Fire.

I felt every ounce of me, screaming out, but the sound was trapped deep in me.

- Snow Patrol, Signal Fire

 

Recently, I had encountered the biggest dilemma I’ve ever had in my entire life–seriously. Why so? First, two people I love are involved. Second, if I don’t decide right now, I will never get to concentrate to my acads, and that cannot happen. And third, I can’t afford to think about this ever again, because its killing me. Really.

 

And then, I’ve decided. Finally. And I know I have to tell it to his face. So, we met up, and we ate lunch together, and he was beside me all the time. Everything’s ready. My good friend told me to just let things flow simultaneously. It doesn’t have to be scripted, I need not practice my lines. I thought I can make it. I thought I was ready. But hell, I wasn’t.

 

I saw how he’s so happy to see me, how eager he was to tell me about their defense, realizing he’s not yet eating.. how excited he was to tell me he wrote me a letter and how gladly he folded the letter into a heart-shaped origami. God, I was very guilty. I never thought he could make me feel such pain.

 

He even permitted me to make an airplane origami out of his 50-peso bill and said it was alright to tear it because to make an airplane, it requires that you tear a certain part..

At that very moment, I knew I can’t telll the bad news to him straight to his face. I knew he’ll be so sad. And I also knew I cannot bear to see him like that.

 

Time passed, I kept staring blankly at the people walking in front of us, kept thinking of what words to say, and how to start. Time passed, and nothing. I know I really can’t do it. Though he sensed that I have a problem because I was thinking so hard, I told him I’m okay and I feel good just staring at people’s reflections or to what their wearing.

 

He thought I was bored. No, I don’t want him to feel like that. So I asked questions–nonsensical questions. Yeah, for the sake of a conversation. I thought I might insert the bad news between my questions… but I just can’t. He was very cheerful and I just can’t imagine hurting him. And so, I gave up.

 

When he saw us off, he insisted to come with us. He held me tightly, but I resisted. When we rode the jeep and saw him walk away, I opened his letter. I was shocked. Unfortunately, it’s now or never. I can’t let this day pass without telling him the bad news.. That I must go. That we should stop this. That this is the last time we’ll be seeing each other. That the game is over.

 

And then, the worst happened. I texted him the bad news. I told him I didn’t have the guts to tell it to his face. I told him I can’t fight anymore. And I told him the game is over.

 

He replied, and the world fell upon me. He said, he would have accepted everything if I told him personally.. He would have prepared for it and we could have talked things over.

  

But I was scared. I can’t. That’s why I texted him.

 

And now, I don’t know what he felt. I can’t feel what he’s feeling. He doesn’t know what I also feel. Because something hinders us. Something blocked the emotions. Technology. And I regret every letter and every word I typed in my cellphone and sent to him.. Because a text message is far too weak to carry the true meaning, the real emotions, and the effect of the message.

 

I regret that I failed to wear my OrCom hat. That I should have thought about the message, channel, the medium, and most especially, the receiver.. I miscommunicated. And I regret it.

 

You might think that I am okay now… To tell you honestly, I’m not. I want to talk to him, looking straight into his eyes, and tell everything that I haven’t told him.. This time, there will be no need for exclamation points or smileys… This time, it’s just me and him, face to face. Let’s see what happens. Let’s wait what we both have to say… But right now, let’s just hope that I won’t regret having said everything that happened to us–here.

 

The only resolution and the only joy,

is the faint spark of forgiveness in your eyes.

- Snow Patrol, Signal Fire

One-third of the Silver.

Happy Silver Anniversary, OrCom!

The cold and rainy morning of September 26, 2009 in UP Manila was ignored by the cheerful and enthusiastic aura of Organizational Communication students who all gathered at the Little Theater for An OrCom Conference entitled: Shifting Paradigms, New Mindsets: Strategic Approaches to Managing the Communication Function in Organizations. The said conference was organized by the Sp137 Class of Professor Adeva.

The keynote speaker was no other than Ms. Yolanda Villanueva-Ong, chairperson of Campaigns Group. She said that were not in the information age anymore, rather, we are already in Extreme Communication Age. Say hi, OrCommunicologists!

In her humble but very inspiring ‘dialogue’ with us, she left us with Three Points to Remember:

1. There are more communication tools today than ever–but nothing can replace the beauty of face to face. Let me quote: “Some things just cannot be Facebook-ed.” Won’t you agree?

2. Organizations need to have a clear vision and the leaders should be responsible enough to communicate it. They have to walk the talk in order to share the vision to the entire organization. It’s not only a matter of building reputation or enhancing image, but it should be something deeper that can make the employees stay committed with the organization.

3. Advocacy is a cultured change. A shared cause is a shared dream. One belief, one common cause–expressed through different forms of communication–defines a stronger organization. An advocacy, once started and continued, for all you know, will make a difference in the world.

Dr. Ronald Henson also presented his paper entitled “Don’t cry and cease!” A proactive crisis management thru planning ang imaging. The presentation deals with two major treatises: “Don’t cry and cease” and “Crisis within a crisis”.

There were three plenary speakers who are all OrCom Alumni, who talked about their careers and OrCom.

Ms. Mary Louise G. Sabariaga, graduated Cum Laude in 2001, is now the Country Marketing and Communications Lead of Accenture Philippines. She talked about the different communication trends and styles that Accenture use in order to remain in the lead.

Ms. Thea Marie Gutierrez, graduated in 2002 and obtained her Masteral Degree in Business Administration at DLSU in 2007, is now working with Petron Corporation as their Customers Initiatives Specialist. I was surprised that she once worked with Landco Pacific Corporation, where I had my practicum. She talked about her career and why we should give utmost importance to our ACADS. Because for Ms. Gutierrez, ACADS means:

Awareness
Consciousness
Adaptability
Deciphered Delivery
Successful Communication

Last but not the least, Ms. Marieper Mendoza, Marketing Manager for Global Procurement Inc., a company engaged in promotions whose clients are several multinational companies such as Jollibee, PAL, and San Miguel Corp., to name a few. What I remembered most about her talk is about the difference between deciding and doing–and that you must decide to love what you do.

Prof. Chadwick Sy Su also presented his paper entitled: Tracing the path between coaching and performance: A study of coaching in an inbound call center program. You can request for a PDF file of his thesis through an email at  fuego_esfadado@yahoo.es.

Due to the heavy rain, Ondoy, the afternoon Conference and the Silver Screen Orcom Alumni Homecoming was moved to October 3, 2009. And God, who’d have thought that the OrCom’s Silver Anniversary will be showered with so much blessings… and so much rain. So, so much that it overflows…

Just one-third of the Silver… The remaining two-thirds is surely to watch out for.

Fast Five Tips: How to Promote your Blog

Hi Beautiful Blogger!

You know what? There are only six tabs that I open whenever I go online. In my correct and standard sequence:

- WordPress.com
- Facebook.com
- Yahoo Mail
- Twitter.com
- Friendster.com
- StephenKing.com

And of course, the omni-present Yahoo messenger on the side, I just can’t afford to not make the sleeping YM icon smile just like me.

How to Promote Your Blog Site:

1. It’s in the Copy. Really.
Use catchy words, phrases or sentences that can make a bored Internet user wake up and click your link!

Example:
- In YM, I used the word ‘Erotica’ to attract those late-night Internet users. Haha! And it’s effective, I think.

2. Don’t tell it to your boyfriend / girlfriend only. Tell it to your Ex-es! Tell everyone!
Post a very interesting copy and the link on your Facebook Wall. Post 5 bulletins with the same catchy copy on Friendster. Tweet another atractive copy with the link! Send a group IM (instant message) to ALL your contacts in YM! Always include the link, kay?

Example:

Subject: Do you hate Judy Santiago?

Message: You must not. Why? Check out her blog and see what she’s up to. Here’s the link:
http://longlivejudyism.wordpress.com

3. Make it personalized! Take every chance! Grab every opportunity!
Let’s do it mano mano! LOL. Create a nice copy with the link, and then, copy and paste it to your friend’s comment box (Friendster), or wall (Facebook), or tweet back (Twitter), or visitor’s message (StephenKing.com). You can also put the link in your signature for your Yahoo Mail! Remember to put your friend’s name so that he/she will think that it’s not a group message and it’s specially for him/her!

Example:

In StephenKing.com, I went page to page to send each friend a visitor’s message.

Hey John Doe! How are you? Can you help me promote my blog? Here’s the link: http://longlivejudyism.wordpress.com
I really need this for school. Though there’s nothing about SK in my blog yet, I’ll post SK-related blogs soon so keep visiting! Thank you very much!

4. Go offline.
Text blasts are always effective. We always check our cellphones more often than our PCs/laptops. Just send a short but interesting (and sweet) text message to all your contacts. And of course, the link… don’t forget the link!

Example:

Are you online? Won’t you check out http://longlivejudyism.wordpress.com for me? Hehe. Thank you very much!

5. Tell your parents. And your siblings. And everyone.
Ask your mom and dad if they can help you out by promoting the link to their officemates. Where else could ther be so much PCs but at the office? Just tell Mom and Dad the link and what to do. They’ll always support you, you know that. And I know what else they’ll tell you afterwards… “Ayan, sige, para maipagmalaki ko ang gawa ng anak ko.”

Whew. That’s it! You know that you don’t make a blog to be read by you and yourself, right? You blog because you want to express something–and in the Cyberspace, the world could be your audience–only if, you start promoting your blog NOW.

Spread the link. Be heard. Long live, Bloggers!